As we approach the holidays, the end of one year and the beginning of a
new one, many couples who are having difficulties in their marriage start
thinking about making changes in the new year. For many couples that means-divorce.
For couples that have never traveled this road before, it can be daunting.
When it comes to divorce, the legal system by its very nature pits people
against each other with the promise of only one winner and with no room
for compromise. I say, “ if you once were in love, able to organize
your lives and build a life together, you should be able to discuss and
organize your lives to dissolve your marriage and to live apart.”
I often tell clients with Mediation everyone is a winner. Mediation offers
a less painful way to approach divorce. Mediation is a different way of
viewing divorce and I like to recommend Mediation to clients as the peaceful
Mediation is a negotiated agreement between divorcing spouses on the important
issues: children, finances and property. The divorce mediator is there
to keep you on track, make sure negotiations are fair and to make suggestions
when you hit a road block. The focus of mediation is you controlling your
own divorce. Not Judges and Not Attorneys. Couples have the opportunity
to discuss their personal needs and priorities and to arrive at an agreement
they both can live with.
Another appealing aspect of the mediation process is time and cost. Most
divorce mediation cases can be resolved in months instead of years, and
can cost tens of thousands of dollars less than fighting your case in
court. Mediation, the less adversarial approach to divorce will keep more
money in your pocket, give you peace of mind, and divorce mediation will
help you keep your dignity in the process.
When couples are considering divorce I try to introduce the more peaceful
approach first. Even when couples are angry I have found Mediation to
be a process that can work. Not all divorces can be resolved using mediation
but the ones that can, should. There is no easy path to divorce but divorce
mediation is a less painful road to travel and should be embraced as the
peaceful alternative in 2011.