EXPERIENCE THE HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL BRENNER DIVORCE MEDIATION METHOD!
What is the first thing you think of when you hear the word “divorce?”
“Fight!” Hire a Lawyer.”
This is the way it’s been ever since the founding of our country when we
imported the British legal model for divorce – the adversarial system. Now that one in
every two marriages in this country ends in divorce, the devastation caused by the system
has come under question. Is there a better way?
Yes. It’s called “Mediation.” New on the radar for the last few years, it is now
becoming more widely known. It was previously employed in labor negotiations, but its
use has been expanding to include family law problems.
Here’s how it works: The divorcing couple hires one individual, instead of two
opposing lawyers, to help them resolve their differences. The mediator is an
independent, unbiased individual, trained in mediation (usually a lawyer or a mental
health professional), whose job is to facilitate an agreement on all issues between the
husband and wife. The results are astonishing and are achieved often in hours and
weeks, instead of months and year. The central truth about divorce today is that it is not
just a legal experience, it is also a psychological experience. In the traditional system
Divorce is a conflict-based, lengthy, and costly process which completely ignores the
important psychological dynamics and behavior of the couple.
As you know abusive relationships are very much in the news today. Many marriages end because one party is abusive, and often the victim is not even aware of the abuse. The old system of divorce encourages people to hurt each other and to fight when it is not absolutely necessary. It is possible for couples to change their automatic behavior and achieve an entirely different outcome.
I developed my unique divorce mediation method during my 35+ years of experience and practice as a divorce attorney, psychologically - trained medical professional, and court-appointed mediator. My divorce mediation method involves behavior modifications, the use of psychology - identifying personality and character traits, emotions, family dynamics, and applying the law to develop strategies for a more positive experience. This method is less adversarial, less expensive, and less time-consuming than the traditional system. It keeps couples out of court and away from lawyers. Unlike the standard approach, this method takes into consideration the feelings, thoughts, and behaviors that affect divorcing couples, and which, if properly identified, can be used to leverage a more successful and calmer outcome.
Unlike the approach of other divorce attorneys my divorce mediation method addresses the pervasive presence of verbal abuse in its many destructive forms:
- Criticizing
- Hiding finances
- Blaming
- Controlling
- Threatening
- Denial
- Insulting
- Withholding
- Ignoring
- Gas lighting
- Separating from friends and family Verbal abuse disguised as jokes.
My divorce mediation method does not approach Divorce just based on the law, it’s based on psychology too! You get to choose how you want to end your marriage. You can litigate, negotiate or mediate. How you navigate the process depends not only on the law of your state but largely upon the psychological dynamics of your relationship; the emotions, thoughts, personality traits and behavior of the individuals.
The personality and behavior of both you and your spouse make a difference—a big difference—in the nature and outcome of your divorce.
Let me help you avoid the traditional horror stories of divorce!
I will work for and with both of you to help you reach a settlement that permits you to
concentrate on the future and the potential it holds. There is a typical process we will use
to reach a settlement; however, your individual needs may cause us to depart from a strict
adherence to it.
During the process we will:
- Develop current and future income information;
- Develop budgets;
- Inventory marriage assets (property);
- Begin to define each of your short – and long-term goals;
- Define general areas of agreement;
- Identify substantive areas of disagreement;
- Identify symbolic and emotional issues;
- Work through the parenting arrangements;
- Negotiate money differences.
If you want to try a highly successful, less expensive, compassionate approach to your divorce call me! I will help you navigate your divorce using the law and psychology to achieve a productive, fair, amicable agreement and a happier future!
Call New York Divorce Attorney and Mediator Lois Brenner today to schedule your Divorce Mediation Session! 212.734.1551
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I had read about Lois’ unusual divorce method in one of her blog posts. It was refreshing to see someone was working with the psychological issues in divorce. My husband is bipolar and getting him to agree to a divorce and commit to the process was tough. When we met with Lois she really understood him. She immediately identified his mental health issues, and because she has a psych background, she was empathetic to his needs and was skillful at guiding him through her divorce mediation process. It took a while but she really got us to a point where we could actually discuss things without my husband blowing up. Her method is unique and it really helped in our situation. She actually recommended a great psychiatrist who changed my husband’s meds at her urging (she has a medical degree too), and my husband is coping much better. We can’t thank her enough for her compassion and advice! If you need a divorce attorney, especially if mental illness is a part of the fabric of your marriage, go see Lois! Thanks Lois - Beena T.
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I am a highly successful money manager and before meeting Lois Brenner, hiring a divorce attorney was a disaster. Two previous divorce attorneys really wasted my funds, and had no savvy when it came to asset and property distribution. Lois Brenner finally fixed the mess I was in. She and her team of financial experts, including attorney Matthew Ehrlich were able to prepare an asset and property distribution that was realistic, keeping in mind tax ramifications, and important distributions and allocations. They negotiated a thorough and financially sound divorce settlement. If you have a lot of assets, just any divorce attorney won’t do. You really need someone with a lot of knowledge. Lois Brenner and Matthew Ehrlich were really impressive. Thanks!!- Michael C.
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“Thank you for doing such a tremendous job!”- Bill
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My divorce was very stressful time. Since we were able to agree with my ex-husband on many important issues I originally thought that I will be able to fill in all the necessary documents by myself. It turned out that it is nearly impossible task. The amount of paperwork was overwhelming! I was not happy with some lawyers I've approached - too expensive, too impersonal, too aggressive. When I met Lois everything changed. For very reasonable price she was able to help us - talked to both of us, gave us great suggestions. Everything went extremely well. It was quick and painless. We could not thank her enough!
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“You are New York’s best divorce lawyer!”- Danielle
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Going through with our divorce was very difficult time for me and my ex husband. Finding the right lawyer was very confusing, frustrating and time consuming. I was very lucky to find Lois. She is professional and human at the same time. In a few sessions she answered all of our questions, gave us great advice and filled and filed all paperwork for us. Our divorce was finalized very quickly and thanks to Lois it was very smooth process. If my best friend would need a divorce lawyer I would recommend Lois without any reservations.!!! Christina C.- Christine C.
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Everything you said about mediation was true. My husband and I really connected in a positive way working out the details of our divorce in mediation with you. The arguing was endless but we finally heard each other. You have a lot of patience. The property discussions made everything so emotional. You kept us focused and stopped us from rehashing the past. We tell everyone about you. Hopefully none of our friends will divorce but if they do we will tell them they need you.- Tom & Philip R.
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I met Lois Brenner at a networking group. She spoke on divorce and mediation. At the time I was not in need of a divorce attorney but was so impressed I kept her information. Two years later I hired Lois Brenner and I am finally separated from a man who nearly destroyed my life. Although we were able to do this with her in mediation, it was not easy for me. She really kept me strong, and on top of myself. She was helpful with both of us, and encouraged each of us when needed. It was much better than going through the court system. It took a lot less time and saved us money too. I can’t say enough about her. She is a special attorney. I tell everyone who will listen how special she is.- Pilar
