Lois M. Brenner, Esq.

During this financially challenging time, don't delay your divorce.
We are offering
FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS!

Free Phone Consultation!

Call Now to Speak with Lois Brenner

646.663.4546
  • Home
  • Meet Lois Brenner
  • Divorce
  • Divorce Mediation
  • Psychology of Divorce
  • Testimonials
  • Blog
  • Contact Us
  • Call Today
  • Email Us
  • Our Map
  • Menu
    Home
    Meet Lois Brenner
    Divorce
    Divorce Mediation
    Psychology of Divorce
    Testimonials
    Case Studies
    FAQ
    Blog
    Case Evaluation
    Contact Us
    Site Map
  • Asset Allocation
  • Business Partnerships
  • Child Custody
  • Child Support
  • Contested Divorce
  • Divorce Litigation
  • Domestic Partnerships
  • Divorce Process
  • Domestic Violence & Abuse
  • Equitable Distribution
  • Estate Planning & Divorce
  • Family Law
  • Fathers' Rights
  • Grandparents' Rights
  • Health Insurance
  • High Net Worth Divorce
  • Life Insurance
  • Matrimonial Law
  • Military Divorce
  • Pensions
  • Prenuptial Agreements
  • Postnuptial Agreements
  • Separation Agreements
  • Taxes
  • Uncontested Divorce
  • Visitation
  • Women's Rights
man and child

New York Divorce Blog

Blog 2012 November So You're Getting a Divorce-Does that Mean You Need to Fight in Court?
Previous Post  |  Next Post

So You're Getting a Divorce-Does that Mean You Need to Fight in Court?

Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. || 8-Nov-2012

Going through a divorce can be one of the most emotionally painful things a person can experience. Two people once united by love or some semblance thereof are now divided due to infidelity, emotional or physical distance, mental or bodily abuse, and a great deal of other “irreconcilable differences.”

Chances are at least one of the two parties in the divorce has been deeply hurt by the other and often I see the hurt party’s decision-making process become clouded by their pain and anger which then becomes the fuel for a long, expensive, and drawn out process in dissolving the marriage—one where nobody wins except the lawyers.

If you are thinking of a divorce or beginning the proceedings you need to know all of your options. Sometimes it is a good thing to fight in court and other times it serves everyone best if you engage in the “supreme art of war” and “subdue the enemy without fighting,” as Sun Tzu so wisely put it.

Mediation is becoming a popular way to obtain a divorce. A specially trainedmatrimonial attorney or psychologist is hired as a mediator who will work with the two parties to direct them away from the hurt of the present and toward a peaceful resolution. Mediation can be as much as ten times lessexpensive than fighting in court, can take as little as eight to twelve hours, and prevents people from doing things to hurt each other over a long period of time prolonging the anguish of divorce.

You can also instruct your lawyer to negotiate with your soon-to-be-ex spouse’s lawyer, invariably keeping both parties out of court—an option that is also less expensive than a fight at the courthouse. The idea here is to work as fast as possible toward a resolution of compromise.

But when do you fight and when do you find a way to get mediation or negotiate? Though each divorce brings a unique set of circumstances, below is a list of a few scenarios that might help you make a decision about when it’s appropriate to instruct your lawyer to go to battle for you.

When to Fight:

  • If there is abuse involved with either the spouse, the children, or both.
  • If one party is refusing to fulfill their obligation to help pay their portion of the mortgage.
  • If one party is refusing to fulfill their familial obligation to pay for their minor child or children’s expenses.
  • Gratuitousirresponsible spending of the marital assets by one or both parties.
  • If financial dishonesty is involved or suspected by one or both parties.

These, of course, are only a few scenarios but if you have any questions as to the choice you are thinking of making, please feel free to call me at (646) 663-4546, and I’d be happy to advise or help you fight or negotiate the outcome you are looking for. I’m Lois Brenner and I will always help you achieve the future you deserve.

Categories: Divorce, Divorce Mediation, Divorce Negotiation, Family Law

Share Post

Rely on Lois Brenner

Call us at 646.663.4546 to talk with Lois Brenner and obtain the legal counsel you need.

Send Us Your Case Now
  • “You are truly the best divorce attorney in New York!”

    - Christine

  • map pin
  • “Thank you for doing such a tremendous job!”

    - Bill

  • map pin
  • “Thank You, Thank You, Thank You!”

    - Sara and Jeff

  • map pin
  • “I didn’t expect to find a divorce attorney as amazing as you!”

    - Deborah

  • map pin
  • “Keep up the good work!”

    - Jonathan

  • map pin
  • “First, you were so easy to talk to and second, you really know what you are doing!”

    - Sharon

  • map pin
Read All Reviews
  • facebook
  • twitter
  • google-plus
  • linkedin-2

Lois M. Brenner, Esq.

Lois M. Brenner, Esq. New York Divorce Attorney 12 East 86th St,
Suite 1230,
New York, NY 10028

View Map

(646) 663-4546


divorcelawyerny.com
  • Home
  • Site Map
  • Privacy Policy
  • Contact Us
Internet Marketing Experts