Litigation sucks! No doubt. I try to help clients avoid it whenever possible.
But sometimes it’s the only way to have a spouse sit up and listen.
But make no mistake, if you are not mentally aware and legally prepared
your divorce can be a disaster. I want to help prepare you and help you
avoid making mistakes when divorcing!
It’s a volatile road to divorce with lots of potholes. Anger, jealously
and arrogance can fuel a nasty, treacherous divorce. All the more reason
you can’t make any mistakes. Don’t let your emotions get in
the way of making good, sound, legal decisions. If you have tried everything,
including mediation, and all else has failed, and litigation is your only
choice you need to prepare for war.
When preparing for battle, you need to follow some sound rules to achieve
victory. Here are a few suggestions:
- Hire the Right Attorney for You!
There are several types of attorneys. Some are sharks, some are easy-going
and still others the right blend.You need a lawyer who is tough enough
to protect your interests but smart enough to negotiate and get you the
best deal.Your attorney should listen to your needs, but guide you with
their expertise. They should return your phone calls and emails promptly
and treat you like a person, not a number.
- Don’t take Legal Advice from your Manicurist!
Everyone will have an opinion on your divorce. Your mom, friends, siblings,
and yes, even your manicurist. Even though they may mean well, they are
not lawyers and conflicting opinions can cause confusion for you. This
is no time to be confused. You are overwhelmed enough. So I suggest you
speak with the experts – divorce lawyers, therapists, and financial
experts when preparing for your divorce. After all, would you have your
hairstylist draft your separation agreement? I don’t think so. Select
the professionals who are going to give you the weapons you need to win.
- Don’t be Afraid to Ask Questions!
Lots of them!! When you select your divorce attorney, go to your first
meeting prepared. Make a list of everything you have floating around in
your head. Having a list will help you address everything that is important
to you. Explore what is possible. Does this have to be litigated? Can
this be negotiated? Could mediation work? What should you expect? How
long should this take? Will a Judge make all the decisions? Will you have input?
- Understand your Finances!
Know what you’ve got, and where it is. Know your income, expenses,
and budget. Will it be possible to settle? Can you support yourself? Your
family? What is realistic financially for your family. Can you actually
afford litigation? Is there a less expensive route? Have realistic expectations.
If you are the paying spouse, don’t commit to more than you can
pay. If you are the receiving spouse, don’t let revenge cloud your
judgment about what your spouse can afford.

If you are considering divorce, have looked at mediation and decided that
litigation is your only path to divorce, give me a call.
We can discuss mediation, if you want to pursue an amicable path. Some
clients come to me because mediation didn’t work with another mediator
and they try mediation with me which is unlike other mediation processes,
since I use a unique blend of psychology and legal strategy that is very
successful!
I will be happy to review your overall situation using both psychological
and legal strategy, and together we can select the best path for you.
Not all divorces have to be litigated, but if yours does, I can also provide
you with a comprehensive legal structure that will champion and protect
you to go to battle and to win!
Let’s get you prepared! Call for your free consultation today! 212.734.1551