We see all kinds of abusive relationships in the news but do you know many
marriages end today because one party is dealing with mental health issues
that result in abusive behaviors that destroy marriages?
Today a person facing divorce Googles “books” online, visits
Amazon.com, or reads my blog after a barrage of confusing advice from
friends and relatives.
You decide, before seeing a lawyer, you want to read a book to help prepare
for the costly and wrenching experience you are about to endure.
You will find several standard guides with such titles as “The Divorce
Handbook,” “Consultation with a Divorce Lawyer,” “Verbal
Abuse,” or “Mediation.” These books will tell you what
to expect as you begin the legal process of separation and divorce. Such
books provide explanations of the procedures of divorce in the traditional
system, from the first consultation with an attorney to the final settlement
After reading them, you will know a great deal about the adversarial system
and about mediation in general, but virtually nothing about the psychology
The central truth about divorce today is that divorce is a “psychological
experience.” Divorce is far more than just what’s in the court
papers or what a judge decides.
Divorce is about people, psychology, and the emotional health of a couple.
The traditional divorce system is a adversarial, lengthy, and costly process
which completely ignores the psychological component of divorce and is
far more interested in conflict and cost.
During my 35 years as a divorce attorney, psychologically-trained medical
professional, and court-appointed mediator, I have developed a psychologically-based
divorce process that is highly effective, whether litigating or mediating,
and most important, healing.
My method involves behavior modifications, the use of psychology--identifying
personality and character traits, emotions, family dynamics, and skillfully
applying the law to develop strategies tailored to each couple for a more
productive and positive experience. My approach is less adversarial, less
expensive, and less time-consuming than the traditional system.
I engage couples in a productive discussion and effective decision-making,
which leads to healthier, more positive outcomes.
Unlike the standard divorce approach, this method takes into consideration
the feelings, thoughts, and behaviors that affect divorcing couples, and
which, if properly identified, can be used to leverage a more successful
and calmer outcome.
It addresses the pervasive presence of verbal abuse in its many HIDDEN
forms which include:
- Hiding finances
- Gas lighting
- Separating from friends and family
- Verbal abuse disguised as jokes
Most attorneys treat divorce as a purely legal (and adversarial) experience.
Divorce is not based solely on the law. It’s about you! All of you!
That includes the psychological makeup of both you and your spouse.
I know taking this step won’t be easy, but gaining your freedom and
happiness will be worth it. As a psychologically-trained divorce attorney
and mediator, I am uniquely qualified to provide you with the psychological
and legal strategy necessary to remove yourself safely from the grip of
a mentally unhealthy marriage. Call me now to find out more…
During the ongoing COVID-19 Pandemic, all our Free 1 Hour Consultations
are conducted virtually to reduce risk and maintain safety.
I look forward to speaking with you!
Continue to stay healthy and safe!
New York Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner is available right now for a FREE