As a divorce attorney and mediator, I receive calls from couples of young
children asking various questions about custody and visitation all the time.
Often, these parents have little idea that “custody” to which
they’re referring is actually a question of visitation. In fact,
many divorcing parents confuse visitation with custody and as such, it
puts the fabric of their relationships in a precarious situation.
To that end, I want to dispel a few myths that surround child custody and
Custody is not defined as the primary residence of the children. Custody
is the right to make decisions, including: What school the children will
attend, the children’s primary care physician, the religion of the
children, and attendance at sleep away summer camp. Custody can be retained
by one or both parents.
Visitation signifies the time children spend with each of their parents—especially
when it is with the parent with whom the children spend less time.
There are many varieties of visitation arrangements. One parent can have
the children living with him full time while the other parent gets the
children for two weeknight dinners and weekends.
Factors in visitation can include: hours and location of parental employment,
location of children’s school in relation to one of the parents’
residence, and the reliability and maturity of the parent.
In determining child custody and visitation rights, the decision is supposed
to be in the best interest of the child. A knock down, drag ‘em
out fight should be avoided.
Solely using the courts to make these decisions is expensive financially
and emotionally. Lawyers can cost tens of thousands of dollars or more
and can often be adversarial, prolonging the time during which a custody
or visitation decision will be made.
Judges can make decisions about your future by relying on the advice of
doctors who assess a families’ dynamics and mental health. But how
well can these doctors get a true understanding of a family after only
a few hours of evaluation?
Mediators are often much better equipped to help divorced parents make
custody and visitation decisions. As a psychologically-trained divorce
attorney and mediator, I use psychology and legal skills to help parents
come to agreements that are in the best interests of everyone—without
spending tens of thousands of dollars. As a mediator, I can also help
divorcing parents make decisions without all of the hurtful emotion behind it.
I very often encourage my clients to consider mediation to work out their
custody and visitation issues. It’s a better vehicle for all involved.
There is no reason to add any more pain to the division of a family.
Need help with custody and visitation? Call me. Mediation may just be the
answer to your problems.
Working with me your mediation process will be Postitive, Productive & Peaceful!
Why don’t you give mediation a try?
I am offering Free 1 hour consultations. Why not join me to learn more…
FREE I HOUR CONSULTATIONS are conducted virtually to reduce risk.
I look forward to answering all your custody and visitation questions and
sharing all the impressive benefits of mediation with you!
Stay healthy and safe!
Call New York Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner now to ask all your custody and
visitation questions now!