When we think of spousal abuse we often hear the wife is being abused,
but men get abused too, and I have helped many of them.
I have worked with a few men in the last year who all found themselves
in very emotionally abusive relationships with their wives.
For a man, recognizing he is being abused is often difficult and emotionally
distressing. In some cases, he doesn’t even realize that he is being
abused. For a man, there can be a lot of shame and embarrassment attached
to knowing he is being abused by his wife.
As a psychologically trained medical professional, divorce attorney and
mediator, I am uniquely qualified to work with men in abusive relationships.
First, I provide a safe and supportive environment for them to express
their feelings and give them a platform to be heard, respected, and understood.
I also have psychiatrist and psychologist on my team to help anyone in
an abusive marriage. In addition, for those that might not recognize they
are in an abusive relationship, I can help them identify the abuse and
provide support and suggestions on how to productively and safely engage
with their spouse to leave an abusive marriage.
By the time a husband consults with me he is already considering separation
and possibly divorce, but often feels really conflicted.
For those who want to invite their wives to participate in a dialogue to
discuss the marital issues, we strategize on how I can help them as a
couple navigate a civil and informed discussion.
My psychologically based divorce mediation process is comprehensive and includes:
- Listening to both parties;
- Acknowledging what they both need and want;
- Encouraging them to speak to each other in productive ways;
- Discouraging talking about the past;
- Identifying the abusive behavior and addressing the “elephant in
the room” with both;
- Providing a safe and supportive environment for productive discussions
- Helping them address and make decisions together on all the important legal
issues, such as child custody, spousal support, visitation, asset allocation,
and property division, just to name a few;
- Guiding them towards the best solutions for their marital problems, whether
it be therapy for possible reconciliation, mediation to dissolve the marriage
in a peaceful manner, or litigation because the anger runs too deep and
communication is impossible.
Some of you may be asking, “What does abuse look like?” Here
are a few signs:
- Constantly putting you down;
- Humiliating or embarrassing you in front of others;
- Refusing to communicate;
- Using sarcasm and an unpleasant tone of voice;
- Using children or money for control;
- Withdrawal of affection;
- Guilt trips;
- Making everything your fault;
- Isolating you from friends and family;
- Extramarital affairs.
If you are being abused and you feel hurt, angry, and confused by the behaviors
of your spouse and are thinking of separation or divorce, call me.
I can help you identify if you are in an abusive relationship, and I will
guide you to successfully navigate a peaceful path to divorce.
As a medically trained divorce attorney/mediator, I can help you free yourself
from an abusive marriage using strategy and psychological skill. No one
deserves to be abused. There is no reason to suffer in silence.
If you are being abused, take a very important step right now. Pick up
the phone and call me.
I will provide you with a supportive and safe environment for you to express
your needs and get the help you need!
If you are being abused by your spouse call New York Divorce Lawyer Lois
Brenner right now to schedule your free consultation.
Call 212.734.1551 today!