Since I have been practicing over 35 years as a medically trained divorce
attorney and mediator, I have had an amazing array of clients from business
owners to therapists to celebrities. Regardless of your position in life,
mediation provides efficiency, privacy, is cost-effective and puts you
About 9 months ago, an up and coming plastic surgeon contacted me for a
consultation. He and his wife had been married 11 years, had 2 children,
and they lived both in New York City and Connecticut.
His wife was a high profile online food influencer, and her husband was
fed up with what he called her "financial excesses." She spent
a lot of money on designer clothes for the children and had redecorated
their family home 7 times in 11 years. Although he was finally becoming
a highly sought after plastic surgeon, he was not happy with paying for
the extravagant lifestyle his wife had created. Even though she was also
earning a lot of money as a food influencer, she was spending all of his
money and saving hers.
They were also in a lot of debt, totaling $156,000, their children were
being spoiled, and as a family they were very unhappy. He felt she was
irresponsible and had spoken with her many times. They even tried a therapist
and nothing was working. He felt he couldn’t stay married anymore,
and he told her he was very unhappy.
As is standard in these cases, the wife initially wanted to hire a lawyer.
The husband was impressed by what he had heard about my unique meditation
process from an attorney and his wife that had successfully used my mediation
process for their divorce. After our conversation, he was eager to share
my mediation approach with his wife.
Honestly, at first I wasn’t sure mediation would work for them. They
were fighting a lot. During our initial meeting, I really had to keep
them focused once his wife finally agreed to try mediation. The wife was
super angry, especially because she felt her husband wanted out of the
marriage because he had let his ego go to his head, and he wanted a younger
woman. She shared her suspicion with me during one of our individual mediation sessions.
It turned out her financial recklessness really had worn on the husband
and he wouldn’t stay in this marriage any more. This deterioration
had been going on for quite some time. He felt very disrespected and didn’t
feel she was a team player in their marriage. They both worked with therapists
from my roster of experts to help them each get a grip on personal issues
they needed to address to move forward.
As the divorce process continued, they settled in to the rhythm of my psychologically
based mediation process, the anger subsided, and they were able to engage
in productive conversations and make thoughtful decisions.
The husband was fair, and agreed to help with the debts although his wife
had generated most of them.
It was important for them to consider mediation for many reasons but in
particular, it helped them keep their privacy while divorcing, which could
have erupted onto front-page news with the wife being a high-profile food
influencer if they had litigated their matter. Not to mention what negative
publicity could do to the husband’s image as an up and coming plastic
surgeon. Cost was also a consideration given their family’s struggle
with financial problems and debt.
The final outcome was fair. The split of the assets was equitable. The
management of the debts was reasonable. The custody, support, and visitation
with the children was decided on thoughtfully.
This couple has just received their judgment of divorce and, the family
is adjusting to their new lives. Their judgment of divorce was received
pretty quickly considering it could have taken years if they had litigated
There is life after divorce. The path you choose to get there can make
all the difference!
If you are thinking of divorce and have questions about mediation and how
it can help you, call me. We can explore together what is possible.
Why choose mediation?
Efficiency: Mediation often resolves faster than traditional court proceedings, letting
you focus on what you do best.
Privacy: Keep your personal matters confidential. Mediation provides a discreet
alternative to public court hearings.
Cost-Effective: Mediation typically costs significantly less than traditional divorce
Control: Have a say in the outcome. Mediation offers you and your spouse the opportunity
to shape the terms of your divorce, rather than leaving decisions solely
in the hands of the court.
Call me now to schedule a consultation! 212.734.1551
I look forward to speaking with you.
Call New York Divorce Attorney Lois Brenner to learn more about her unique
psychologically based divorce mediation process.
Why spend many, many thousands of dollars on a court battle when you can
work things out without lawyers and judges, discreetly, quickly, and all
the while saving money.
Schedule your consultation today! Call 212.734.1551