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Taking Your First Divorce Step!


When did you start thinking about divorce? Was it during the coronavirus pandemic? Was it because of finances, fighting, infidelity, control issues, social media postings, or did you simply fall out of love?

Couples don’t just wake up one day and decide they want a divorce. A lot of time, thought and preparation goes into the decision. When people meet with me virtually for a free consultation, often they want to learn about their rights, what they are entitled to, the procedures, and how to get started. When divorcing, knowledge is power!

These days I am hearing from many spouses who have been trapped in their homes due to COVID-19 that they are tired of being in unhappy marriages. They want change, and after living through COVID-19 and social unrest, they have decided life is too short to stay in an unhappy marriage. They all want to know, “What is the first step?”

As a highly skilled divorce attorney and psychologically-trained mediator, I begin all my free consultations (the very first step) by listening to all the details, answering questions of concern and by giving a brief overview of the three major areas of importance to consider which are as follows:

  1. Property

Property is divided into separate and marital property in New York State, and there are different rules governing each of these. Property includes not only bank accounts and real estate, but such things as businesses and retirement accounts. Sometimes the couple has a prenuptial agreement that determines what happens to their property in a divorce.

  1. Spousal Maintenance/Alimony

These are regular payments over time intended to rehabilitate a spouse who has been out of the job market and needs help getting back into the work force. This applies to both men and women today.

  1. Child Custody/ Child Support

Custody means the right to make decisions, and the time spent with each parent is also included here. In addition, the law provides guidelines for child support with various add-ons and exceptions.

Finally, during our consultation, I share that you can choose whether to mediate divorce, negotiate the terms through lawyers, or go to court. What many don’t realize is there are alternatives.

Most people when thinking of divorce, assume they will fight and go to court, but today there are other less adversarial avenues available. You should consider them all. Understanding all the options is not always easy. As a divorce attorney/psychologically-trained mediator I can explain how each path works and help you evaluate what will work best for you and your family. I encourage clients to choose the best process for them.

Divorce is not “one size fits all”! Divorce is unique to each and every family. My role is to explore all the aspects of your family dynamic, consider all the details and guide you towards the best possible divorce solution.

If you want to make a change in your life, and you are thinking of divorce, take this first step. Remember, starting over requires confidence, courage and determination.

If you need help with making this change, call me. I can also guide you on how to safely approach your spouse with the difficult conversation about divorce. It can be a lot easier than you think. I will be happy to share with you some of my truly successful methods.

During the ongoing COVID-19 Pandemic all our highly informative 1 Hour Consultations are FREE!

All consultations and mediation sessions areconveniently conducted virtually to reduce risk.

I look forward to speaking with you.

Continue to Stay Healthy & Stay Safe!

Warm regards,


Call New York Divorce Lawyer, Lois Brenner now to book your free consultation. 212.734.1551