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If You Are Struggling With Your Marriage, a Legal Separation Could Help!


Over the last few months, I have spoken with many couples who are really struggling with their marriages.

These couples are sad, confused, and not quite sure what path to take. They often say, “I don’t know what to do, I’m conflicted.” Just the idea of divorce for some is very painful.

Some couples have been married for 20 plus years and the marriage is just not working any more. Others are married 8, 10, 12 years and are dealing with constant fighting, abuse, cheating, a spouse hiding assets, and in some cases mental illness.

There’s a lot of inner turmoil, fear of the unknown, and often a deep desire to keep the family together especially during these challenging times. Still others have been affected by the past year, have done a lot of soul searching, and want a change for the better.

For those who are not quite ready to plunge into a divorce, and when living apart could be an important first step, I sometimes recommend a physical separation.

A legal separation is a contractually defined and court-honored agreement between a couple who have chosen to live apart but are still legally married.

As one of my family-friendly divorce tools, depending on some of the psychological components of the marriage, I show couples how taking this approach can have constructive benefits as their first step in considering whether or not to divorce.

A legal separation can kick-start making some important decisions about:

1. Child support

2. Visitation

3. Spousal support

4. Analysis of monthly expenses

5. Development of budget

6. Creating a co-parenting schedule

For those couples who might want to stay married, a legal separation also leaves the door open for reconciliation. My motto is, “Whenever a marriage can reasonably be saved without harm, it should be attempted.”

In addition, a legal separation can provide some important benefits:

1. Spending time apart can help clear your head;

2. Give you the opportunity to lay out the terms of divorce in advance;

3. Get some guidance from a marriage counselor/therapist;

4. Introduce spending time apart to the children;

5. Maintaining health insurance coverage;

6. Still filing joint Income taxes;

7. Consulting with an attorney/mediator to prepare if divorce is the next step.

Divorce is not one size fits all. Sometimes divorce is not the final answer and a legal separation can be a helpful vehicle for getting a marriage back on track.

If you need some creative advice on how to approach your divorce, drafting a separation agreement, and leaving your options open to reconcile if that’s your wish, call me.

With over 35 years of experience as a lawyer and psychologically-trained mediator, I can draft a thorough agreement and provide you with the support and tools necessary to start this journey.

Our FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are very informative and conveniently conducted virtually to reduce risk!

I look forward to speaking with you.

Stay healthy and safe!

Warm regards,


Call Attorney Lois Brenner a Legal Separation Specialist Now to schedule your FREE consultation!