Whether you’re just thinking about divorce or are deep in the process, you probably have dozens of questions. From how much it costs, to what happens with your children, to how to handle a high-conflict spouse and it can feel overwhelming.
As a medically trained NY divorce attorney and mediator for over 35 years, I have been guiding and successfully helping thousands of divorce clients. Below I will answer divorce questions based on thousands of searches across Google, ChatGPT, Instagram, and TikTok.
1. How Much Does a Divorce Cost?
The cost of divorce depends on how you choose to handle it.
- Litigation can cost anywhere from $12,000 to $50,000 (or more) per person.
- Divorce mediation is often a fraction of that, saving couples thousands.
My advice: “When possible, try mediation. Mediation minimizes conflict, speeds resolution, and dramatically reduces expenses.”
2. How Long Does Divorce Take?
An uncontested divorce may take a few months, while contested cases can drag on for years.Choosing mediation can shorten that timeline significantly since you set the pace, not the court.
3. Do I Need a Lawyer, or Can I Do It Myself?
In New York and many other states, you can file for divorce without a lawyer but you mistunderstand your rights.
If you and your spouse are open to communication, a mediator can guide you through every step without courtroom drama.
4. What Happens to Property, Assets, and Debts?
All marital property like homes, retirement accounts, businesses, and even credit card debt, must be divided fairly.
In mediation, you and your spouse decide together, instead of leaving the decision to a judge who doesn’t know your life.
5. How Is Child Custody and Support Decided?
Custody depends on the best interests of the child, not who files first.
Through mediation, parents can build creative, flexible parenting plans that work for everyone, without fighting in court.
6. What If My Spouse Is Difficult, has a character disorder or is a Narcissistic?
If your spouse refuses to cooperate or constantly blames you, mediation can still work especially with a medically trained divorce attorney and mediator, like myself.
I use my background in psychology and law to manage high-conflict personalities and help you find a fair resolution.
7. How Do I Know If I’m Really Ready for Divorce?
This is one of the most common emotional questions people ask on social media and ChatGPT.
I encourage clients to reflect on key questions:
- Have you tried communication, counseling, or temporary separation?
- Do you feel emotionally and financially safe?
8. How Do I Rebuild My Life After Divorce?
Rebuilding starts with reclaiming your confidence and setting small goals.
Mediation often helps people feel more empowered, not defeated, because you stay in control of decisions.
9. What’s the Difference Between Mediation and Litigation?
Litigation: adversarial, expensive, public, and slow.
Mediation: confidential, faster, and far less stressful.
My insight: “Litigation is about winning. Mediation is about healing.”
10. What Happens If Mediation Fails?
If mediation doesn’t lead to full agreement, you still save time and money, because much of the groundwork is already done.
Often, even partial agreements reduce conflict in court later.
I often tell my clients “Divorce doesn’t have to destroy your life. With the right guidance, emotionally and legally, you can end your marriage respectfully, protect your children, and move forward with peace.”
If you’re considering divorce or facing a difficult spouse, I, along with my team of litigators and experts can help you. My unique and highly successful medically/ psychologically-based divorce mediation method blends law, empathy, and strategy, helping couples separate with dignity.
Call now to schedule your free and confidential consultation 212.734.1551.
I look forward to helping you and your family get a new start.
Warm regards,
Lois
Divorce