Over the last few weeks I have spoken with couples who are really struggling
with their marriages.
These couples are sad, confused and not quite sure what path to take. They
often say, “I don’t know what to do, I’m conflicted.”
Just the idea of divorce for some is paralyzing. Ending one’s love
story is not as easy as you might think.
There’s a lot of inner turmoil, fear of the unknown, and often a
deep desire to keep the family together especially during these challenging
times. But issues are escalating, being in close quarters is making living
together impossible, and couples are looking for some type of relief.
For those who are not quite ready to plunge into a divorce, and when living
apart could be an important first step, I sometimes recommend a physical
separation. A legal separation is a contractually defined and court-honored
agreement between a couple who has chosen to live apart, but is still
legally married.
As one of my family-friendly divorce tools, depending on some of the psychological
components of the marriage, I show couples how taking this measure can
have constructive benefits as their first step in considering whether
or not to divorce, especially now!
A legal separation can kick-start making some important decisions about:
- Child support;
- Visitation;
- Spousal support;
- Assets;
- Property;
- Analysis of monthly expenses;
- Development of a budget.
For those couples who might want to stay married, a legal separation also
leaves the door open for reconciliation. My motto is, “whenever
a marriage can reasonably be saved, without harm, it should be attempted.”
In addition, a legal separation can provide some important benefits:
- Spending time apart can help clear your head;
- Give you the opportunity to lay out terms of divorce in advance;
- Get some guidance from a marriage counselor/therapist;
- Introduce spending time apart to the children;
- Maintaining health insurance coverage;
- Still filing joint Income taxes.
Divorce is not one size fits all. Sometimes divorce is not the final answer
and a legal separation can be a helpful vehicle for getting a marriage
back on track.
If you need some creative advice on how to approach your divorce, drafting
a separation agreement, and leaving you options to reconcile, if that’s
your wish, call me.
With over 35 years of experience as a psychologically-trained divorce attorney
and mediator I can draft a thorough agreement and provide you with the
support and tools necessary to start your possible divorce journey during
this unpredictable time.
During this medical crisis our
FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are conducted virtually by telephone or TeleDivorce by Skype or FaceTime
to reduce risk and maintain safety for everyone!
We still have some virtual appointments available for this week.
Call now to book your free consultation.
212.734.1551.
I look forward to working with you!
Stay Healthy & Safe!
Warm regards,
Lois