Getting divorced is the last thing a couple wants to think about in the
midst of losing jobs, facing illness, stock markets fluctuating, routines
being disrupted, and deciding on how to school your child safely.
But don’t let the coronavirus stop you!
For couples struggling in emotionally challenging and unhappy relationships,
divorce for them is front and center. So how do you start a divorce process
with so much uncertainty about the future?
I explain to my clients that there are ways to divorce as we all adapt
to the new form of “normal.” In the divorce arena that means
courts are adjusting and changing how filings and proceedings are handled.
Court appearances/meetings are handled virtually and telephonically.
While we may be living in an emotionally charged and upsetting time, I
say, ”Focus on what you can control.” If that means releasing
yourself from a relationship that no longer serves you or makes you happy,
let it go!” There is no need to be confused about how to do it.
You can take the steps necessary to end your marriage right now!
My Five Tips to Peacefully Prepare to End Your Marriage Are:
1. Research Your Divorce Options
To mediate or litigate? How do you decide? It will depend on how well you
and your spouse can communicate. If discussion is possible, then mediation
is possible. Mediation will give you both an opportunity to have a rational
conversation with the guidance of a mediator. It is peaceful, less expensive,
and not as time intensive as litigating. If litigation is your path because
communication is next to impossible, then you will each hire an attorney.
This process is more expensive, will most likely be combative, and is
time consuming. No matter the path, pick your lane and pursue your happiness.
2. Create a Budget
It’s important to do an analysis of your lifestyle. You want to understand
how much money you will need to cover your living expenses. While spending
time at home, review your checking account and credit card bills. Having
this financial picture will help you determine how much money you will
3. Consider Your Living Arrangements
Think about how your living arrangements will change. What will your options
be based upon your budget. Can you stay in the marital residence? Will
you have to move out? What can you afford? Should you try to stay in the
same neighborhood where your children are residing?
4. Discuss a Parenting Plan
Having a co-parenting plan is critical. Start thinking about it now! This
pandemic requires careful consideration especially for safety purposes.
Living and travel arrangements should be discussed in detail.
5. Understand Divorce Logistics
Beginning a divorce process during a pandemic looks different. You will
be meeting your attorney/mediator by phone or virtually. Dealing with
children while navigating this process from home is a juggling act.
With everyone spending more time at home, having privacy to consult with
an attorney/mediator is a big challenge. However, it is possible. It just
takes some coordination of schedules.
If you want a divorce right now, don’t let the coronavirus stop you.
Yes, there are some challenges, but consider for now that this is our
Staying in an unhappy marriage is painful. You can let go of the pain and
move forward with your new life by taking a few important steps.
I have been successfully helping couples over the last few months during
this pandemic to engage in productive discussions, and make life changing
decisions. The first step is to pick up the phone and call me. I will
answer all your questions and guide you. You don’t have to put your
happiness on hold. I’m here to help!
During the ongoing COVID-19 Pandemic, all our
FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are conveniently conducted virtually to reduce risk and maintain safety.
I look forward to educating you on the divorce process. I promise your
first step will be liberating.
Call me today!
In the meantime please continue to stay healthy and safe!
New York Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner is available for a FREE consultation.
We still have some appointments available this week. Call 212.734.1551.