As a seasoned New York family law attorney, mediator, and psychologically
trained medical professional, I regularly advise mothers and fathers going
through divorce who are considering a custody action.
For those couples who can agree on custody, I help them make amicable custody
decisions. For those spouses who cannot agree on custody, I, along with
my litigation partner and team of experts, fight for what is in the best
interests of the child.
I find parents have a fair amount of misconceptions as to what custody
actually means.
From the outset, it’s important to know that custody is not about
where the child resides physically. It’s about the right to make
major decisions on matters, which includes the child’s residence,
education, medical care and religious upbringing.
In my more than 35 years of experience, I’ve witnessed many custody
battles that can be vicious, lengthy, excessively expensive and painful
for the children.
For parents going through a divorce, if you want to be sure you make the
right choice when it comes to your child’s custody – put your
child first and consider that there are peaceful methods for settling
a child custody dispute.
Consider the following:
1.
Mediator: A third party who can help negotiate an acceptable agreement. This is
a person who helps spouses communicate but doesn’t make any decisions
for them. Someone who can save you time and tens of thousands of dollars.
As a psychologically-trained mediator, I have successfully negotiated
agreements with legally creative solutions for parents that have been
in the best interest of the child and the family. I say, “why fight
and spend money over an issue that can be discussed rationally and resolved
civilly.”
2. Lawyers Negotiate Out of Court: As straightforward as it sounds, it’s for spouses who tell their
attorneys to try to stay out of court. This may be an option when negotiating
is possible.
3. Parent Coordinator: This is a relatively new practice used in some states to manage ongoing
issues in high-conflict child custody and visitation cases. This is usually
performed by a professional psychologist or a social worker assigned by
the Court. The coordinator meets with both parents regularly handles questions
and complaints, and makes recommendations to the mother and father. These
are usually supported by the judge.
There are times when using the court to settle child custody is necessary.
But understand judges can make decisions about the future of your children
without having all of the facts or a true understanding of the psychological
dynamics within your family. This option is often the priciest and most risky.

If you have any questions regarding a peaceful, creative, and less expensive
approach to child custody, please call me at 212.734.1551.
All our
FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are conveniently conducted virtually to reduce risk.
I look forward to helping you make custody decisions that are in the best
interest of your child and your family.
Stay healthy and safe!
Warm regards,
Lois
New York Divorce lawyer Lois Brenner is offering a free child custody consultation.
Call 212.734.1551
Our Free Consultations are in high demand so call now!