Skip to Content

My Survival Guide for Divorcing a Narcissist!

Illustration of an upset couple

If you are going to divorce a narcissist, my survival guide will help you! Are you ready! Do you have what it takes? Come on! You can do it! And I can help…

As a medically and psychcologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I have navigated successful divorces for spouses married to narcissists for decades. This is a particular area of expertise that most divorce attorneys don’t have!

If you are divorcing a narcissist you will need courage and strength to fight for what you want and to successfully detach from a narcissist while securing a happier future.

A narcissistic spouse will try to bully, control and intimidate you. They thrive on seeing you punished or daring you to go against them. They will convince you that you are the crazy one! Well, I’m here to tell you, you are not crazy. That’s what the narcissist wants you to think. It’s time to take power and control back from your narcissitic spouse!

It’s important to understand that narcissism is a personality disorder.There are other personality disorders like Borderline, Bipolar, and paronoid that I deal with in my practice.

Narcissists come in all shapes and sizes and have the following behaviors:

  • Overexaggerate their importance, popularity and accomplishments;
  • Exploit others for personal gain;
  • Need their egos constantly fed;
  • Crave admiration;
  • Like to pit people against each other for his/her pleasure;
  • Manipulate using lies and threats;
  • They are judge, jury and executioner.

Is your spouse blaming you for everything? Making you question your sanity? Do they demand automatic compliance from you? Get pleasure out of your pain?

Then you are probably married to a narcissist and you are going to need some heavy duty armor to divorce them.

Divorcing a narcissist requires comprehensive preparation. That means psychologically and financially.

My Survival Guide For Divorcing A Narcissist suggests:

Channeling Your Inner Talent as a Spy

Gather as much information as possible!

Make copies, take pictures of statements, assets, and all important documents like:

  • All bank accounts
  • Investment accounts
  • Retirement accounts
  • Pay stubs
  • Tax returns (at least 3 years)
  • Insurance (life and health)
  • Mortgages, titles to property
  • Vehicle registration/title
  • Valuables-antiques, art and jewelry

Getting Reacquanted With Your Finances and Expenses

You have probably relinquished financial control to your narcissistic spouse. Losing power and access to finances is not unusual. It’s part of the “trapping” mechanism a narcissist puts into place to maintain control over their victim. You don’t see bills, know what the household expenses are or see credit cards detailing what is spent. You’re also not seeing that your spouse is treating his mistriss to vacations, gifts of jewelry and spa days. Start looking at the credit card statements, bills and figure out expenses so you can paint a true financial picture of your lifestyle. It’s time to get strategic!

Assembling Your Divorce Team!

This will be a valuable investment in your future!

You will need a strategic, psycholgically astute attorney to provide you with support. Not just any divorce attorney will do in your battle against a narcissist. As a psychologically-trained divorce attorney/mediator, I am uniquely prepared to help you face off with a nacissistic spouse. I, along with my skilled divorce team can provide a comprehesive support system offering legal strategy, psychological insight, and financial forensics to get you the best possible results. Choose your divorce team wisely!

We can also help you respond and fight the narcissist’s favorite tactic-gaslighting! Once a narcissist feels like they are losing control they turn up their gaslighting manuevers. They will start lying to attorneys, the judge and even your children. They will continually deny conversations and events. We are experts in handling narcissists and their gaslighting behaviors.

A narcissist is a toxic, high-maintenance personality. You will need an attorney/mediator skilled in handling a narcissist to gain your freedom and prevail in obtaining a successful divorce.

If I can help you navigate a safe path out of this type of marriage, call me right now! A free consultation is a phone call away 212.734.1551.

I am familiar with the traits of a narcissist and uniquely trained as both a medically and psychologically trained divorce attorney to help you successfully and safely divorce the narcissist in your life.

Don’t be afraid! Working with me and my team of experts will give you the psychological/legal support you need to free yourself from a narcissistic spouse!

Warm regards,


Divorcing a narcissist takes courage and an attorney skilled at combating the toxic behaviors of a narcissist.

Call New York Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner now to schedule your free consultation.

Call 212.734.1551