Getting custody of your children when divorcing can be a big challenge.
As a child custody specialist, I can guide you successfully through the process!
Most courts prefer a shared or joint custody arrangement. When a parent
wants sole custody, I often tell them that they will have to show having
sole custody will be in the best interest of the child.
For over 35 years, as a divorce attorney, mediator and child custody specialist,
I have guided thousands of parents on how to prepare properly so they
get the custody arrangement they want.
Parents can sabotage their chances of custody if they are not careful.
If getting custody of your children is important to you, here are some
of my suggestions:
1. Don’t Talk Negatively About Your Ex
Your children may ask difficult questions. It’s important to be honest,
but you need to be positive and not bad-mouth your spouse. Keep your opinions
and feelings to yourself. Don’t put the weight of speaking negatively
about your spouse on your child. Speak to family, friends or a therapist,
not to your child.
2. Don’t Misuse Alcohol or Drugs
Don't misuse alcohol or drugs, especially when you are with your children.
This behavior will provide ammunition for your spouse. Making a poor choice
hurts your children. You cannot behave in any way that will put your children
at risk. Your role as a parent is to make good choices that will protect
3. Don’t Be Late For Visits
Don’t make this mistake! It disappoints your child! Show up, arrive
on time, show your children they matter. Let them know they are a priority!
Being irresponsible in this way can communicate to your spouse or the
court that you are not a committed parent. Divorce is very hard on children.
Try to demonstrate as often as possible that you are reliable, their protector,
and you love them.
4. Don’t Talk About Your Divorce With Your Children
You may be tempted to do so, but don’t. Let your children be children.
Do not burden them with an adult subject. Don’t demonstrate poor
judgment. Don’t ask them questions about your spouse. Don’t
share details with your child.
5. Don’t Refuse to Follow Court Requests!
If you want to win custody, it's important to honor every request the
court makes of you. Don't refuse to do anything the court is asking
of you. You must show the court you are all-in as a parent. If the court
thinks you would benefit from a parenting class-take it! If counseling
is necessary-do it right away!
It’s time to show everyone how far you are willing to go to be a
6. Don’t Lie
When you want custody, don’t lie about your ex!
No unfounded allegations of abuse or stories about addiction that don’t
exist to get custody. Any lies you tell about your spouse will come back
to bite you! Lies will most definitely hinder your chances at getting custody!
Going to court is not the only way to get custody of your child. You can
also discuss custody using the process of divorce mediation. If a parent
is not capable of having custody and understands this, custody can be
arranged mutually by the spouses without going into a court setting.
This process is more family-friendly, less expensive, and can happen quicker
than going to court!
As a divorce attorney, mediator, and child custody specialist, I have helped
many parents negotiate custody arrangements that suit the needs of each parent.
Sometimes sole custody serves the children better if there is a spouse
who is medically ill, mentally ill, abusive, dealing with an addiction,
abandonment, or incarceration.
If you need help with custody of any type, sole or joint, I can help you
secure the type of custody that will be in the “best interest”
of your child.
For over 35 years, as a divorce attorney/mediator, and child custody specialists,
my litigation partner and I have fought for the rights of children and
their families in the divorce process.
We are the child custody dream team!
Let us help you and your family. Call now to schedule your free consultation.
FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are
conveniently conducted virtually to reduce risk.
We look forward to helping you secure the custody of your child.
Stay healthy and safe!
If you want custody of your child, call child custody specialist New York
Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner now to schedule your free consultation 212.734.1551.