As a divorce attorney and mediator, I receive calls from couples of young
children asking various questions about custody.
Often, these parents have little idea that “custody” is actually
a question of visitation. In fact, many divorcing parents confuse visitation
with custody and as such, it puts the fabric of their relationships in
a precarious situation.
To that end, I want to dispel a few myths that surround child custody and
visitation.
Custody is not defined as the primary residence of the children. Custody
is the right to make decisions, including what school the children will
attend, the children’s primary care physician, the religion of the
children, and attendance at sleep-away summer camp. Custody can be retained
by one or both parents.
Child custody can be one of the most contentious issues in a divorce, as
it affects not only the parents but also the children involved. When going
through a divorce, it’s important to understand the reasons why
you deserve custody of your children.
Here are 10 reasons why you may deserve custody of your child in a divorce:
1. Best Interests of the Child
The court always considers the best interests of the child when determining
custody. If you can prove that you are the parent who can provide the
best care, stability, and emotional support for your children, you have
a strong case for custody.
2. Parental Relationships
The bond and emotional ties between you and your children are crucial factors
in the court’s decision. If you have a strong, positive relationship
with your children, this can greatly increase your chances of receiving custody.
3. Ability to Provide a Stable Home
The court considers the parent’s ability to provide a safe and stable
home for the child. If you can prove that you have a stable living environment,
with a secure job and income, you are in a strong position to receive custody.
4. Ability to Meet the Child’s Needs
The court will consider the parent’s ability to meet the child’s
physical, emotional, and educational needs. If you can show that you are
committed to meeting all of your child’s needs, this can help to
build a strong case for custody.
5. Employment and Financial Stability
The court will consider the parent’s job stability, income, and ability
to provide for the child’s needs. If you are able to demonstrate
that you have a steady job, a stable income, and the financial resources
to provide for your children, you have a strong case for custody.
6. Ability to Co-Parent
The court will consider the parent’s ability to work with the other
parent in making decisions and raising the child. If you have a history
of being able to work effectively with the other parent, this can help
to build a strong case for custody.
7. Mental and Physical Health
The court considers the mental and physical health of both parents and
its impact on the child. If you can show that you are in good mental and
physical health, this can help to build a strong case for custody.
8. Domestic Violence or Abuse
If there is a history of domestic violence or child abuse, the court may
limit or restrict the abusive parent’s custody rights. If you can
prove that you have never been involved in any form of domestic violence
or child abuse, this can help build a strong case for custody.
9. Substance Abuse
If either parent has a history of substance abuse, the court may consider
this when making custody decisions. If you can demonstrate that you have
never been involved in substance abuse, this can help to build a strong
case for custody.
10. Wishes of the Child
The court may consider the child’s own preferences and opinions depending
on his age and maturity level. If you can show that your children want
to live with you, this can be a strong argument for custody.
As an alternative to court, mediators are often much better equipped to
help divorcing parents make custody decisions.
As a psychologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I use psychology
and legal skills to help parents come to agreements that are in the best
interests of everyone—without spending tens of thousands of dollars.
As a mediator, I can also help divorcing parents make decisions without
all of the hurtful emotion behind it.
I very often encourage my clients to consider mediation to work out their
custody issues. It’s a better vehicle for all involved. There is
no reason to add any more pain to the division of a family.

When it comes to child custody in a divorce, there are many factors to
consider. By understanding and presenting the reasons why you deserve
custody, you can increase your chances of being awarded custody of your children.
Need help with custody? Call me. Mediation may just be the answer to your problems.
Why don’t you give mediation a try to solve your custody issues?
I’m a phone call away…
I offer free 1-hour consultations. Why not join me to learn more…
All our
FREE I-HOUR CONSULTATIONS are
STILL AVAILABLE virtually.
I look forward to answering all your custody questions and sharing all
the impressive benefits of mediation with you!
Warm regards,
Lois
Call New York Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner now to ask all your child custody
questions now!
212.734.1551