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My Divorce Dont's!


As a divorce attorney/mediator for over thirty-five years, I’ve seen many spouses make some bad divorce mistakes. Most of the time decisions fueled by anger will not be in your best interest.

Please don’t do it!

I know you’re angry, frustrated and ready to cut loose, but don’t you need a level head to make important financial decisions for your future and that of your family?

I suggest you pause, take a breath, and think about your future. While you are doing that,

here are some of my “divorce dont’s” that you might find helpful:

1. Don’t Be in the Dark About Finances

Know where the money is! If your spouse has handled the finance do some searching. Start locating all your accounts. Make copies! You need to look for bank account statements, checking account statements, brokerage and retirement accounts, tax returns-at least the last 3 years, credit card statements, life insurance policies, pension statements, and anything that relates to your marital lifestyle. If your spouse uses or moves assets without your knowledge, you may have to hire legal and forensic accounting experts to help you locate and value the assets.

2. Don’t Provide an Inadequate Budget

When you are completing your Statement of Net Worth-fill your budget our thoroughly. Spouses don’t realize the budget is a screenshot of their marital lifestyle. Be complete and as detailed as possible. You want to receive everything to which you are entitled.

3. Don’t Disregard the IRS

When a divorce is final, you may get taxed on the marital assets you have received. It’s important to know the value of the asset you receive on an after-tax basis. It’s smart to speak with a tax advisor along the way so you are getting the best deal possible.

4. Don’t Passively Sign Your Separation Agreement

You will be living with it for a long time. Make sure your agreement includes everything you need and want. There is rarely a redo. Don’t feel pressured to sign an agreement that is not in alignment with your needs and that of your family. If your divorce attorney or mediator is not listening to your concerns, have another lawyer review your situation. You may decide your current attorney needs to go!

5. Don’t Dismiss Mediation

If you and your spouse can work things out, keep your families’ money in your own pocket. Mediation is a really special process. It can save you many, many of thousands in legal fees and emotional distress.

The mediation involves a neutral third-party a divorce attorney/mediator that will meet with you and your spouse to discuss all the issues and help you reach an agreement. The mediator can be a skilled voice of reason in your divorce process.

Mediation will give you the flexibility to discuss important issues affecting your family and make the best decisions for a healthy way to move forward.

Mediation is a lot less stressful on you and your family. It allows you to make decisions in a safe and compassionate environment with the support of an experienced neutral person.

For over 35 years as a divorce attorney and mediator, I have been guiding spouses successfully to find the right path to divorce. If you need help with your divorce, I would be happy to show you all your options! Call me today!

Our FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are very informative and conveniently conducted virtually to reduce risk!

I look forward to speaking with you.

Stay healthy and safe!

Warm regards,


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