Divorce can be a difficult and an emotionally and financially draining
process, especially for those who are a professional or in the public eye.
As a medically/psychologically trained divorce attorney/mediator for over
35 years, I can tell you, divorce disputes can often be resolved more
amicably through mediation.
I got a call last week from a neurosurgeon who said during a consultation,
“I hired an attorney and my wife and I have been tied up in divorce
litigation for 2 years. Our case is going nowhere, we are spending a fortune
on lawyers and my whole family is miserable. My wife and I want to do
this is in a smarter, healthier way. Is it still possible to mediate?”
My answer was, “Yes!”
Mediation is a process where a neutral third party, known as a mediator,
helps couples to reach an agreement on the terms of their divorce. This
can include dividing assets, deciding on child custody arrangements and
setting up child support payments.
Mediation can be a much less contentious process than going to court and
it can often save time and money for both parties.
So why do so many professionals choose to forgo mediation and instead engage
in lengthy and costly legal battles? There are several reasons why this
may be the case.
Professionals may be more likely to have complex financial arrangements,
such as multiple businesses or investment portfolios, which can make the
mediation process more challenging
but not impossible.
Another reason why professionals may be reluctant to pursue mediation is
the fear of negative publicity. High-profile divorces often generate a
lot of media attention, and professionals may be hesitant to engage in
a process that could be seen as admitting fault or weakness. They may
also be concerned about how their image will be portrayed online or in
the media and may worry that mediation could make them look less powerful.
However, despite these challenges, there are many compelling reasons why
professionals and everyone should consider mediation when going through
a divorce. Here are just a few of them:
- Mediation is often faster and more cost-effective than going to court.
Rather than spending months or even years in legal battles, couples can
often reach an agreement in just a few weeks.
- Mediation is less adversarial than going to court, which can help to preserve
relationships and reduce animosity between ex-spouses. This can be particularly
important for celebrities who may need to continue working together or
for those who will be co-parenting their children.
- Mediation can be more flexible than going to court. Rather than being bound
by the decisions and rules of a court, couples can work together to create
a customized agreement that works for their unique situation.
- Mediation is confidential, which means that the details of the divorce
are less likely to be made public. This can help to protect the privacy
of both parties, which can be particularly important for professionals
- Mediation can be a more empowering process for both parties. Rather than
feeling like their fate is in the hands of a judge or lawyers, couples
can work together to create a solution that works for them. This can be
particularly important for celebrities and professionals who are used
to being in control of their careers and personal lives.
While there are certainly concerns to pursuing mediation, there are also
many compelling reasons why it can be a smart choice. By working with
a neutral third party to reach an agreement on the terms of their divorce,
professionals can often avoid costly legal battles, preserve relationships
and protect their privacy.
Divorce can be a difficult and stressful process for anyone, but mediation
can help make it a smoother and more amicable experience.
Here's my divorce mediation checklist to help guide you whether you
are a doctor, lawyer, celebrity or anyone considering divorce. Everyone
can benefit from the many powerful benefits of mediation.
- Choose the Right Mediator: The first step in the mediation process is to
choose the right mediator. Look for a mediator who is experienced in divorce
mediation and who has a good track record of helping couples reach agreements.
I am a medically and psychiatrically trained divorce attorney and mediator.
My triple threat approach to divorce is unique and highly successful.
I’m familiar with character disorders like narcissism, bipolar,
depression and others.
- Understand the Mediation Process: Before you begin mediation, it's
important to understand the process. The mediator will help guide you
through the process, but it's important to know what to expect. I
will be happy to explain to you how the process works.
- Determine What Needs to be Decided: Before you begin mediation, make a
list of the issues that need to be resolved, such as division of assets,
child custody arrangements, and spousal support. This will help keep the
mediation process on track.
- Gather Financial Information: Both parties should gather financial information,
such as bank statements, tax returns, and investment portfolios. This
information will be used to help determine the division of assets.
- Determine Your Goals: Before you begin mediation, determine what your goals
are for the process. This will help you stay focused on what's important.
The mediator can help you decide your agenda as well.
- Keep an Open Mind: During the mediation process, it's important to
keep an open mind and be willing to compromise. The goal is to reach an
agreement that works for both parties.
- Be Honest: It's important to be honest during the mediation process.
Hiding information or being deceptive will only prolong the process and
make it more difficult to reach an agreement.
By following my divorce mediation checklist, you can help ensure that your
divorce process goes smoothly and that you reach an agreement that works
for everyone involved.
Remember that the goal of mediation is to reach a solution that is fair
and equitable, so be willing to compromise and keep an open mind throughout
Whether you are a doctor, lawyer, IT professional, financial advisor or
celebrity, or anyone considering divorce, if you have questions about
mediation and how it can help you, call me. We can explore together what
is possible. Mediation saves time and money and can be a thoughtful and
less angry divorce path.
Call me now and take advantage of a free consultation to learn more…
I look forward to helping you.
Call New York Divorce Attorney Lois Brenner to learn more about her highly
successful and unique psychologically based divorce mediation process.
Receive a Free Consultation today! Call 212.734.1551