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My 10 Survival Tips for Safely Divorcing a Narcissistic Spouse!


Divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be a challenging, traumatic, and scary experience. Narcissists can be emotionally manipulative and controlling, making the divorce process more difficult than it needs to be. But don’t shy away from removing yourself from this toxic relationship. Your better life depends on it!

If you are thinking about going through a divorce with a narcissistic spouse, it is important to take the necessary steps to protect yourself and your children.

Here are my 10 survival tips for safely divorcing a narcissistic spouse:

1. Don’t Engage in Arguments

Narcissists thrive on conflict and will often try to engage you in arguments. It is important to stay calm and avoid engaging in arguments. This will help to deescalate the situation and prevent it from escalating further.

2. Create Boundaries

Setting boundaries is an essential part of divorcing a narcissistic spouse. This may involve setting limits on communication or establishing boundaries around your personal space. It is important to be clear and consistent in your boundaries to avoid confusion or manipulation.

3. Focus on the Children

If you have children, it is important to focus on their needs during the divorce process. Narcissists may use the children as a way to manipulate and control you. It is important to keep the children out of the conflict and to prioritize their well-being.

4. Keep Records

It is important to keep a record of all interactions with your narcissistic spouse. This includes emails, texts, and phone calls. If your spouse becomes abusive or makes threats, it is important to have a record of the conversation.

5. Be Prepared for Smear Campaigns

Narcissists may try to damage your reputation by spreading lies or rumors. It is important to be prepared for this and to have a plan in place to address any false allegations.

6. Protect Your Assets

Narcissists may try to take advantage of the divorce process to gain financial control. It is important to protect your assets and to ensure that you receive a fair settlement.

7. Seek Support

Divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be emotionally draining. It is important to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist. A support system can help you to stay grounded and provide a source of emotional support.

8. Hire a Stealth Lawyer/Mediator

The first step in divorcing a narcissistic spouse is to find an experienced lawyer. Narcissists can be incredibly manipulative and may try to control the divorce proceedings. A seasoned lawyer will be able to provide you with the necessary guidance and support to protect your rights and ensure that you receive a fair settlement. As a medically-trained divorce attorney/mediator, I am uniquely skilled at identifying and managing a narcissist in the divorce process.

9. Stay Strong and Calm

It can be difficult to stay empowered when dealing with a narcissistic spouse. However, it is important to remain calm and composed. This will help to prevent the situation from escalating and will demonstrate that you are in control.

10. Love Yourself

Finally, it is important to take care of yourself during the divorce process. This may involve engaging in self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends. Taking care of yourself will help you to stay grounded and emotionally resilient.

Divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be a challenging and emotionally draining experience.

You will need strength and preparation!

As a psychologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I am familiar with the traits of a narcissist and uniquely trained to help you successfully and safely divorce the narcissist in your life.

If I can help you safely navigate a path out of this type of marriage, let me know.

All our FREE 1 HOUR CONSULTATIONS are still available virtually.

Warm regards,


Call New York Divorce Lawyer Lois Brenner now to rid your life of a narcissist.

Schedule your free consultation right now!

Call 212.734.1551