Recent Posts in Psychology Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 27-Feb-2023 The Psychology of Marriage and Divorce and What You Need To Know! Marriage and divorce are two significant life events that can have a huge impact on one's mental health and well-being. While marriage can bring happiness, companionship, fulfillment and love, divorce can be a challenging and emotional process ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 24-Feb-2023 My 10 Survival Tips for Safely Divorcing a Narcissistic Spouse! Divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be a challenging, traumatic, and scary experience. Narcissists can be emotionally manipulative and controlling, making the divorce process more difficult than it needs to be. But don’t shy away from removing ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 30-Jan-2023 Trapped in a Bad Marriage? We Have Solutions! Thinking about divorce? Is your spouse hiding money, mentally unstable, cheating, or abusing you? Or perhaps you are in agreement with getting a divorce and you just need a “voice of reason” to guide and protect you in the process? As a ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 4-Jan-2023 Are You Tired of Being Controlled by a Bully in Your Marriage? During a recent phone consultation, I spoke with a woman in her early 30s who tearfully explained she had lost control over her life. Her husband of 5 years had insisted she have a child right after they married, give up her career and insisted she ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 23-Dec-2022 Is a Narcissist Ruining Your Life? You may ask yourself, “How did I get here? Why did I let this happen to me?” What was I thinking?” The answer is you were seduced by a narcissist’s charisma and cunning tactics. Don’t be too hard on yourself. The best ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 2-Dec-2022 Did You Know Psychology Plays a Big Role in Divorce? With more than 35 years of experience as a psychologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I heard the cries of many spouses and mastered techniques using psychology and sound legal strategy to get couples thoughtfully and successfully through ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 14-Nov-2022 Ready to Divorce Your Psychopathic Spouse? It won’t be easy! You are going to need psychological strength and legal know-how. I’m her to help! As a psychologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I meet all kinds of people in tumultuous marriages suffering from various ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 11-Nov-2022 My Psychological Approach to Divorce Will Change Your Life! With more than 35 years of experience as a divorce attorney and psychologically–trained mediator, I am a strong advocate for divorce with dignity. I have mastered techniques using psychology and sound legal strategy to get couples through the ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 31-Oct-2022 8 Signs You Are Being Controlled By Your Spouse! During a recent phone consultation I spoke with a woman in her 30s who tearfully explained she had no control over her life. Her husband had multiple separate accounts and wanted to know all about her finances, but would share no information about ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 3-Oct-2022 Is Divorce Anxiety Stopping You From Getting Divorced? Are you thinking about divorcing but afraid to take the first step? Is the thought of getting a divorce keeping you up at night? Do you get heart palpitations every time you start googling divorce attorneys? Yes, divorce anxiety is a real thing. As a ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 22-Aug-2022 Get Divorced Now and Change Your Life! I often tell my clients going through a divorce, the only predictability in life is change. We all dread and reluctantly develop coping mechanisms for managing the inevitable change that is part of being human, just as we are all adjusting to life ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 21-Feb-2022 The Psychology of Divorce With over 35 years of experience as a divorce attorney and psychologically trained mediator, I am a strong advocate for divorce with dignity. I have mastered techniques using psychology and sound legal strategy to get couples through the divorce ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 24-Dec-2021 Divorce Story As a divorce attorney and psychologically-trained mediator, I hear all kinds of diverse divorce stories. I have decided to share some of these stories monthly with you. Naturally, I will change the names and some of the details to protect my clients. ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 8-Dec-2021 5 Signs You Are Being Bullied by Your Controlling Spouse! During a recent phone consultation, I spoke with a woman in her late 30s who tearfully explained she had no control over her life. Her husband had multiple separate bank accounts and was cutting back on the monthly money he gave her as an allowance. ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 24-Nov-2021 Are You Embarrassed to Admit You Are Being Abused by Your Wife? As a psychologically trained divorce attorney/mediator for over 35 years, I have helped many women in abusive relationships, but I’ve also helped abused men too! Men abused by their wives are entitled to be believed, heard, and helped. A man ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 28-Jun-2021 How to Divorce a Sociopath! As a psychologically trained divorce attorney and mediator for over 35 years, I have helped many spouses escape the clutches of a psychopathic partner. Divorcing a sociopath is not easy! But it is possible. Let me help you… Psychopaths tend to ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 11-Mar-2021 Are You Being Verbally Abused? “You idiot, now you have made me angry! You’re stupid! You are useless! No wonder you are fat. Look how you cleaned your plate!” Sound familiar? Yes, you are being verbally abused! But you don’t have to take it anymore! Many ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 23-Oct-2020 7 Signs You Are Being Controlled by Your Spouse During a recent phone consultation I spoke with a woman in her 40s who tearfully explained she had no control over her life. Her husband had multiple separate bank accounts and was cutting back on her “spending money,” which he gave her ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 7-Oct-2020 Taking Your First Divorce Step! When did you start thinking about divorce? Was it during the coronavirus pandemic? Was it because of finances, fighting, infidelity, control issues, social media postings, or did you simply fall out of love? Couples don’t just wake up one day ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 5-Oct-2020 What is a Statement of Net Worth? What is a Statement of Net Worth? When divorcing, a Statement of Net Worth is that annoying financial form your attorney/mediator sticks in front of you and says, “Fill it out!” You look at it, start sweating, and think, “Oh no! ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 21-Aug-2020 6 Steps to End a Toxic Marriage Relationships that have unhealthy patterns like abuse, infidelity, addictions, and so on, are more common than you think. This is a serious problem, and its affects can be paralyzing. Lots of people on the outside often wonder why you stay in an ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 31-Jul-2020 3 Tips for Managing Divorce Anxiety Yes, divorce anxiety is a real thing! Divorce conjures up all kinds of stress, and fear! As a psychologically-trained medical professional and divorce attorney, I can spot divorce anxiety right away. I often see the symptoms before my clients do. Why ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 24-Jul-2020 7 Signs Your Spouse is Hiding Assets When a client comes to see me to discuss divorce, it is not unusual for me to hear I think my spouse is hiding assets. I have no idea what assets we have, or where they are. What do I do?” I advise couples getting married to pay attention to ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 15-Jul-2020 The 3 P's of Divorce Mediation! Positive, Productive & Peaceful For over 35 years I have served the NYC area as a psychologically-trained divorce attorney and mediator. After witnessing the pain of many couples day after day, I decided to develop a unique mediation process to address divorce in a more humane and ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 10-Jul-2020 5 Signs Your Spouse has a Personality Disorder! As a psychologically-trained divorce attorney and mediator, I receive many calls from spouses who talk about their marriages that are filled with drama, hostility, verbal abuse, and high intensity. When I hear some of these descriptions, I often ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 3-Jul-2020 How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce! A player from a major league baseball team called my office and scheduled a phone consultation. His wife seemed to have bipolar disorder and/or depression. He had tried to cope with it for many years, especially as he was on the road a lot, but he ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 26-Jun-2020 Are You Wavering About Your Divorce? It's a big decision. You've been thinking about it for a long time. Should I? Shouldn't I? Yes, I really should. But what will it mean? How do I tell my spouse? These are the questions I often hear from people who consult with me. Usually ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 12-Jun-2020 4 Reasons to say "Goodbye" to your Divorce Lawyer! Why did you hire your divorce attorney? An impressive legal background? Great reviews? A family referral? Whatever the reason, if you are not happy with your divorce lawyer, and they’re not doing a great job for you, it’s time to them to ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 10-Jun-2020 It's Time for Change! Taking your First Divorce Step! I often tell my clients going through a divorce, the only predictability in life is change. We all dread and reluctantly develop coping mechanisms for managing the inevitable change that is part of being human, just as we are all adjusting to life ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 5-Jun-2020 Divorce Mediation - The Peaceful Alternative! During these difficult times of medical confusion, loss of jobs, and socially painful unrest, as a divorce attorney and mediator, I am happy to offer spouses a peaceful approach to divorce. It gives me great pleasure to offer a productive alternative ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 1-Jun-2020 DIVORCE: With or Without Lawyers! It’s true! The courts will be opening up again soon! The backlog will be brutal, and for many of you thinking of divorce going to court may be unnecessary! Why go to court when you can divorce without lawyers. You will avoid the turmoil of the ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 29-May-2020 Do You Know Your "Marriage Money Style?" Money for most of us is an emotionally charged topic. That’s why few of us and few couples like to talk about it. When couples come to see me and are considering a divorce, money can actually be, yes, even more than sex, what is driving the ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 22-May-2020 Did You Know a Postnuptial Agreement can Save Your Marriage? Getting married is very exciting! Spring is that time of year when brides are eagerly gearing up for their June weddings and all the glitz, glamour and drama that a wedding brings virtually in this new world in which we are living! But what about the ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 20-May-2020 3 Tips for Handling Divorce Anxiety! Yes, divorce anxiety is a real thing. As a psychologically-trained medical professional, mediator and divorce attorney, I can spot divorce anxiety right away. I often hear and see the symptoms before my clients do. Why wouldn’t divorce be ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 18-May-2020 5 Tips to Help You Talk to Your Spouse about Divorce while in Quarantine Kevin and Laurie have been married for 15 years. They have a 6 year old daughter with behavioral problems. Kevin is a financial planner, and Laurie works part-time as a computer programmer. For the past 2 years, Kevin has been concerned that his wife ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 15-May-2020 Men Get Abused Too! When we think of spousal abuse we often hear the wife is being abused, but men get abused too! I have worked with a few men in the last six months who all found themselves in very emotionally abusive relationships with their wives. The abuse then ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 11-May-2020 How are You Handling Your Marital Issues During this Pandemic? With social distancing our “new normal” and many states maintaining a shelter-in-place mandate, unhappy couples are stuck at home with no escape. With school cancelled, no babysitters to help, working at home, caring for children and ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 6-May-2020 Is Your Spouse Depressed? As a New York divorce attorney and psychologically-trained mediator I hear from a lot of spouses who want a divorce because they have realized they have been living the horrors of being married to a narcissist or sociopath. But there are other ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 1-May-2020 Divorcing Safely During a Pandemic! Being quarantined together is difficult even for those of us in good relationships. For couples going through divorce, or about to go through divorce and in a dysfunctional relationship, it’s a nightmare! Right now, due to the Corona virus ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 24-Apr-2020 Are You a High Conflict Couple? As a divorce attorney and mediator I can tell you divorce litigation is very rarely a positive process. Mediated and negotiated settlements are increasingly popular especially among divorcing couples in today’s COVID-19 climate. A high conflict ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 16-Apr-2020 Why I Suggested My Client Quarantine with His Ex-Wife and Her Boyfriend! These days, as a divorce attorney and mediator, I help clients virtually using my mediation process, which, especially now, helps clients save money, time and maintain safety. Two weeks ago, I helped a divorced couple with what is by far one of my ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 14-Apr-2020 Can a Legal Separation Help Couples Struggling During the Coronavirus Pandemic? Over the last few weeks I have spoken with couples who are really struggling with their marriages. These couples are sad, confused and not quite sure what path to take. They often say, “I don’t know what to do, I’m ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 10-Apr-2020 5 Ways to Stay Sane While Locked Up in an Unhappy Marriage During the Coronavirus Pandemic! The coronavirus has changed our everyday lives beyond our understanding. We are all trying to be strong, go with the flow, and find creative ways to cope. Then there are those of us unhappily locked up with our spouse or significant other in an ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 6-Apr-2020 The Courts are Closed but Did You Know You Can Divorce Without Going to Court? That’s right! This coronavirus pandemic has drastically affected all of you wanting a divorce! But as a very skilled divorce attorney and psychologically-trained mediator I can tell you, there is a welcome solution. It’s called Mediation. ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 3-Apr-2020 Are You Married to a Narcissist? As a divorce attorney and psychologically-trained mediator I uniquely guide couples, especially those with behavioral problems, towards dignified divorces. Many of the couples I work with complain that narcissism is an unhealthy third party in their ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 30-Mar-2020 Are You Living in a Miserable Marriage? It's Time to GET OUT! You may have been living in an unhappy marriage and just not gotten the courage to do anything about it. It's easy to keep putting it off because you know it will be unpleasant. But now, due to the coronavirus pandemic, you are stuck at home 24/7 ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 27-Mar-2020 Can Mediation Help Your Domestic Partnership? As a divorce attorney and mediator for over 35 years I have helped thousands of couples in all kinds of relationships. You may be thinking, “What is a domestic partnership?” In New York, a domestic partnership is defined as a legal ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 25-Mar-2020 Mediation: A Superior Solution for Divorcing Spouses and their Families during the Coronavirus Pandemic! As a divorce attorney & psychologically-trained mediator I am juggling tons of emails and phone calls from clients divorcing and spouses thinking of divorcing during the coronavirus pandemic. These couples’ issues began way before the ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 23-Mar-2020 Do You Need Help Divorcing an Addict? Actor Ben Affleck recently said his divorce from actress Jennifer Garner was the biggest regret of his life. Unfortunately, his alcohol addiction contributed to the dissolution of their marriage. Spouses faced with addiction being a third party in ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 17-Mar-2020 Are You Thinking of Divorcing During the Coronavirus Pandemic? I know that thinking about or getting a divorce, under the best of circumstances, is an overwhelming experience. Divorcing while dealing with the Coronavirus is the last thing you need. Unfortunately, anger, abuse, infidelity, neglect, and ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 11-Mar-2020 You Don't Need an Attorney to Get a Divorce! It’s true! If you are unhappy in your marriage and you have tried everything, the clock is ticking and it’s time to harness the power to manage your own divorce with my groundbreaking psychologically-infused divorce mediation method that ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 4-Mar-2020 Divorce Tips for a Stay-at-Home Spouse! Are you wondering how you are going to survive financially if divorce comes knocking at your door? I received a phone call over the weekend from a devastated spouse who said, “I can’t believe it, I have been married, I thought happily for ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 2-Mar-2020 Dads are Much More than just Child Support Payments!! When a married couple goes through a divorce, one of the most contested issues is often their children. As a psychologically-trained mediator and divorce attorney for more than thirty-five years, I’ve seen countless custody disputes. For many ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 26-Feb-2020 My Best 2020 Divorce Advice! Divorce is traditionally a painful and dreaded process, but it doesn’t have to be as awful as you expect! To help you with your 2020 divorce goals, I’m sharing my suggestions for protecting yourself, your family and your finances. As a ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 20-Feb-2020 Are you sure Your Spouse is Paying the Taxes? It’s that time of year again. Dreaded tax time is coming up! Everyone is scrambling right now to get all their documents together to get them to their accountant. For those getting a divorce, taxes are the least of their worries, or so you ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 12-Feb-2020 4 Valentine's Day - Healthy Marriage Tips! As you know Valentine’s Day is Friday! Yay!! Traditionally couples in the millions get engaged on this day. Being a divorce attorney and psychologically-trained mediator in the love and divorce business for over thirty-five years, sadly, I ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 10-Feb-2020 What to Do when your Spouse Wants a Divorce! It is not unusual for a spouse to hear with no warning from the other that they want a divorce. There can be a lot of factors influencing a partner to come to this decision; another woman or man, a midlife crisis, psychological issues and sometimes ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 29-Jan-2020 Divorcing? Remember your Spouse is no longer your "Best Friend" Divorce is often a rude smack in the face. On your wedding day, if you are lucky, you married your best friend. But now with the wear and tear of life, you have grown apart, you are no longer “in love” and divorce is your new paradigm. As ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 20-Jan-2020 3 Tips to Settle a Child Custody Dispute As a seasoned family law attorney, mediator, and psychologically-trained medical professional, I regularly counsel mothers and fathers going through divorce who are considering a custody action. Often these concerned parents have a fair amount of ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 13-Jan-2020 10 Signs You are in a Verbally Abusive Relationship! Many people who come to me for a consultation have no idea that they are in a verbally abusive relationship. They know that something is wrong, but they can't put their finger on it. As a psychologically-trained divorce attorney I can identify ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 30-Dec-2019 Tips to Divorce-Proof your Relationship in the New Year! New Years is right around the corner. Traditionally, many couples get engaged on New Year’s Eve. Being an attorney in the field of family law for more than thirty-five years, I expect that some of the New Year’s engagements will end in ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 20-Dec-2019 The Pros and Cons of Sole Custody of the Children! As a psychologically-trained divorce attorney and mediator it is unusual these days to see one parent asking for the sole physical custody of the children. I recently met with a client who was insisting on this. This type of request can sometimes be ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 18-Dec-2019 Did you Know you can Divorce Without Lawyers? Divorce? Oh no! We’ve all heard the horror stories from friends, newspapers, blogs and tabloids. The typical divorce can be a nightmare, and everybody loses. Except, maybe, the divorce attorneys, who get paid for their time while divorcing ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 2-Dec-2019 4 Tips for Handling Divorce Anxiety During the Holidays! Yes, divorce anxiety is a real thing. As a psychologically-trained medical professional and divorce attorney, I can spot divorce anxiety right away. I often see the symptoms before my clients do. Why wouldn’t divorce be stressful? There are so ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 19-Nov-2019 Are You Living with a Controlling Spouse? My new client seemed very anxious and started twirling her hair around her finger. She started by telling me that she was very concerned because her husband kept separate bank accounts and he was cutting down on the “spending” money he ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 11-Nov-2019 Could your Spouse be Bipolar? A divorcing couple came to see me for mediation. The husband had significant outstanding credit card bills. He also drank quite a bit. The wife wanted a divorce and they had one child. Whenever we had a meeting, the husband dominated the meeting, ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 6-Nov-2019 5 Signs you are Married to a Psychopath! As a divorce attorney I meet all kinds of people from all walks of life. I have found many clients don’t always realize the kind of person they are married to. For example, some clients are married to someone with a character disorder and they ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 4-Nov-2019 10 Signs your Spouse may be Cheating! Do you lie awake at night and wonder? Do you have a feeling in the pit of your stomach most of the time? You know something is not quite right, but you can’t put your finger on it. Do you think your spouse is cheating? Are you afraid to ask? Do ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 22-Oct-2019 5 Signs You are in an Unhealthy Relationship! As a psychologically-trained divorce attorney I can often spot the signs of an unhealthy relationship even before my clients do. My advice in some cases is to seek therapy, in others I strongly suggest they consider divorce. If you see yourself ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 15-Oct-2019 IS YOUR SPOUSE A NARCISSIST? You would be very surprised to learn that psychological problems plague many divorcing couples today, and they don’t even know it. That is until now! When you look at the complex issues that infect families like verbal and physical abuse, ... Continue Reading Posted By Lois M. Brenner, Esq. 18-Sep-2019 Poor Mental Health Destroys Marriages! We see all kinds of abusive relationships in the news but do you know many marriages end today because one party is dealing with mental health issues that result in abusive behaviors that destroy marriages? Today a person facing divorce Googles ... Continue Reading